A Matter of Miscommunication

By Nikki Pelezo / Dirt Roads

While I was out attending the few and far between garage sales last weekend, Charlie calls and tells me he is at McPeak Orchard and do I want any over ripe strawberries for freezer jam. You might think this is a fairly common communication, but even in these days of marvelous inventions some spots in Northeast Texas don’t fare very well for cell phones. I was getting every other word and so was Charlie.

I managed to get some of his conversation regarding him buying over ripe strawberries at McPeak’s so I can make him a batch of strawberry freezer jam. I asked him, when he gets home, to see if we have any Certo, and if not to call me so I can pick up the much needed pectin. Many of my words were garbled because he kept asking me what is Certo. I explained about ten times, but I don’t think I made him understand. I ended the conversation by saying “there’ll BE NO strawberry freezer jam without Certo!”

When I arrived home Charlie was on his lawnmower oblivious to anything around him except the continually growing grass. I walked into the kitchen and this is what I found:

Let me give you all a simple lesson in the way of the world. Certo is the brand name for pectin, which gels jam so you do have to cook it to death. Beano is the brand name for a food enzyme that is used in a pot of beans to lessen the effects of gas. Certo and Beano are in no way related to the other, but yet Beano is the only word he heard me say in conjunction with strawberry freezer jam.

I made a trip to Gilmer and back to get the pectin:

26 miles round trip………………………….$3.86 for a gallon of gas.

Certo pectin………………………………….$3.00

Homemade Strawberry Freezer Jam———–Priceless